ssjdebusk:

deanaroundthecassy:

SCENE: HOTEL ROOM Boyfriend, DEAN, is mad at boyfriend, CASTIEL-a lover’s tiff ensues. DEAN acts like angry high school girlfriend whose boyfriend did not call her back

Me during this: Dean you have intimacy issues. And I don’t mean you can’t commit, cause you can’t do that either but somehow you accomplish both being clingy and distant. I mean you are just SO angry that Cas isn’t there for you, doesn’t come whenever you call immediately.

Hd’s angry that he came for buisness and not for pleasure and he is especially angry that he ignored him but came when it was about work and not about Dean’s feelings. Sam is his brother but Cas is who he talks things out with. He is intimate with Cas in a way he will never be and has never been with Sam. He hides his flaws and his doubts from Sam and bares his soul to Cas because that’s how he sees Cas. A person to whom he can be intimate with. Which is strange because Cas is not exactly a touchy feely kind of guy and he’s probably not gonna get a lot of the human issues Dean goes through. But Dean picks him to trust implicitly and be intimate with in a way he has never been intimate with another person. And they haven’t even hugged at this point. 

He’s angry during this entire season because he needed Cas to be there for him and Cas picked heaven over him essentially, when before Castiel was the only person who ever put Dean first. And I think Dean misses that importance he had, that urgency in which Cas cared for HIM for a change. In Cas’ own way. Now he’s vying for attention and he’s, quite frankly, jealous. His jealous and he’s angry at being ignored. He is an army wife essentially. 

It’s amazing to me that this show can each season give Dean and Cas different romance tropes, unmistakably romantic in nature, the whole “they hated each other and now they find out they’re more alike and connected than they thought”

then we got season 5 “you’re just my friend // I’m going to doll you up teach you how to get the guy —— wait I wanna be the guy” with a little “wartorn lovers” vibe going on, a little “odd couple // partners in crime” action. Oh and of course there is the whole, sticking with you til the end endverse thing, and the whole rebelled against the whole of heaven specifically for Dean. You know. There’s that. OH he also dies to give Dean’s plan more time.

Then we move into tragedies (move into lol we’re already there) season 6 we got Dean as the “army wife” vying for Castiel’s attention, Castiel is wrapped up in an epic betrayal in order to protect Dean (wanting Dean to be happy even if that means he never sees him as he morosely watches him rake leaves) which culminates in them both lying and then being found out in a dramatic confrontation. We have the break up – and the tragic death before Dean can say he’s sorry or for them to make it right.

AND then s7 the cue de graw is a mourning arch. The unrequited love arch of “why do i feel this profound loss oh fuck it’s because i was in love with fml” and then the heartbreaking fated reunion, we got an entire fucking episode of amnesia!cas and Dean, for the first time, unloading on someone and talking about his feelings because it’s Cas and thats what they do. ANd is that just a romantic trope out the wazoo. Cas scarifies himself to fix Dean’s brother, to be honest that was really the only way they were ever gonna make any progress towards Dean forgiving Cas. Then Cas is, again, tragically different from the Cas Dean knows and is starting to figure out was in love with. He even gives an epic speech in S7 about how angels cant love and if they try it just breaks them apart HM I WONDER WHO HE WAS TALKING ABOUT and then like 10 minutes later Hester shows up and says “the very touch of you corrupts. from the moment castiel laid a hand on you in hell he was lost” calling back to EXACTLY WHAT DEAN SAID EARLIER EXCEPT DEAN SAID LOVE.

And then of course there is ALL OF FUCKING S8 WHICH IS BASICALLY A GODDAMN PRE-SLASH FIC. We got running through purgatory, not leaving til Cas is with him THE I NEED YOUS, Cas never going to leave but making sure Dean left because he knew he wouldn’t leave without him, lying to protect him AGAIN. Then we got disappearing, and Dean thinking he’s dead, and him not being dead and boners and Dean being so happy he could burst that Cas was with them and hunting, and the Cas saying he’s suicidal and the mind control and long disappearances and fights in a crypt as he screams that he needs him and the blade falls because no matter how many times you train a person when the time comes they will never be able to kill the one true person that they love. As proved through that episode through comparing his feelings for Dean to his feelings for Meg. And Dean is AGAIN upset in 8×22 because Cas didn’t trust him and come to him, the same issues he has in this scene above and will have about 10x more because Cas will always lie and do whatever it takes to keep Dean away from the things that could hurt him even if that thing is himself WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT HE IS DOING RIGHT NOW BY LEAVING THE BUNKER WITHOUT A WORD OR DEMANDING AN EXPLANATION (which is how Misha sees it) and Dean coming back to him in 9×06 and dealing with human Cas which hurts like a bitch because he’s again not REALLY the Cas he once knew all those years ago, as Cas says “everything is different now” but by the end neither of them want to leave each other because this story no matter how much it may be forced down tucked away or purposefully broken demands to be told

their story was not meant to exist but it grew and developed into one of the most beautiful love stories ever told not because it’s perfect or because they’re perfect or because it was some writers long thought out plan but because when Dean and Cas exist in the same space they create their own heat. The build meaning and love and understanding and create their own love story without or even despite what was planned. 

That’s a kind of fate you don’t fuck with. You give it room to breathe and you feed it because this kind of thing. This beautiful strange little flower that has bloomed between the cracks of a broken sidewalk that is the world these characters have lived in is a gift. It is a light at the end of a tunnel for a faithless man and you’re damn fucking right I will fight for their happy ending. I’ll fight til the last page of the last chapter of this story because if this marvelously simple truth cannot survive the trials and tribulations of this long hard journey. Then what was the point of working so hard to get to the end.

Dean deserves better than the promise of someday happiness while you deny him something that makes him happy. And it disgusts me to think that writers that have put characters through what Dean and Sam have been through would do them the dishonesty of giving them unfitting ends.