thinlyflower:

Your abuse is still valid even if

-it’s verbal

• So many people think verbal abuse isn’t real. IT’S SO FRICKEN REAL I’VE EXPERIENCED VERBAL ABUSE ALL MY LIFE. STOP! WITH! THAT! CRAP!

-You sometimes have good moments with your abuser

• People think it has to be ALWAYS 100% bad with your abuser, sometimes they can be nicer than other times. It doesn’t make the abuse invalid or not real for you enjoying a good moment.

-You still love them

• Sometimes it’s not as easy to hate an abuser. Especially if they are a significant other or part of your family, or even close friend. It’s okay, it makes sense why you would love them. It doesn’t mean you are making up the abuse or exaggerating it.

You forgive them

• People forgive others to come to terms with what happened to them and move on. It doesn’t mean it’s “less bad” than other people who hate their abuser. It’s not always easy and sometimes it can be confusing and hard. It’s okay if you forgive them it doesn’t mean the pain stops there or the pain ends. Keep going.

You can’t remember parts of it

• Your brain most likely blocked out a lot of it. It doesn’t mean it was made up or a dream. It feels so invalidating for people to not believe you when you mix stories up or repeat them a different way. When it comes to abuse you’re bound to not remember everything.

You are blamed for it

• I have been blamed for my abuse as I have done something wrong. YOU ARE NOT IN THE WRONG. NO MATTER WHAT “MISTAKES” YOU THINK YOU MADE. YOU ARE NOT IN THE WRONG. IT IS SOLEY THE ABUSERS FAULT.

People don’t believe you

• Especially if the abuser hides it well that they’re an awful person. As much as it hurts to not have them know or understand. Just know that you know what happened to you and that’s all that matters. Your mental health is the most important.

You’ve been abused

Every single person who has experienced abuse whatever the form may be you ARE VALID. No matter how many people don’t believe you or blame you for it. It was NEVER and NEVER WILL BE your fault. Keep fighting loves. You are so strong I am in awe.