cookievampiress:

morthils:

deliciouslycookingrpgideas:

a-daks:

probablybardrpgideas:

probablystrangerpgideas:

probablybardrpgideas:

Kids these days who think that being a bard is just about swinging swords and playing lutes disgust me. Where’s the pizzazz? The showmanship? The seduction??

you ain’t a real bard until you seduce your way out of at least 19 situations that would normally end in combat

You’re not a real bard until you make your DM cry because you seduced the Big Bad that they’ve built up to for 10 sessions

Once a bard friend rolled a 1 for a seduction and ended up killing a girl and tried to hide the body. He was caught, rolled low on deception and they all thought he was fucking her corpse.
He then tried seducing the guards and rolled low again so all the guards had boners while arresting him and the DM had to sideline the entire game and make up a dungeon for the rest of us to get our stupid bard out of.
But we didn’t. So for like 3 nights the DM essentially ran 2 different games, one of us questing without ol’ corpsefucker and then the adventures of corpsefucker: escape from boner castle.

He seduced his way out, naturally.

A true bard

I don’t know a damn thing about D&D but this funny as fuck

lightoftheempath:

heterophobicjonathanbyers:

buckthegrump:

roman-ova:

stardustparker:

timesarehardfornewsies:

girls-who-love-stars:

lostenemies:

list of men i trust:

• john mulaney
• andy samberg

• Terry Crews

• Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson

• Tom Holland

• Lin-Manuel Miranda

• Taika Waititi
• Keanu Reeves
• Sebastian Stan

• Bob Ross

• Chris Evans

• Mr Rogers

• John Oliver

thother:

Putting ur phone face down on the table at family events is gay culture

scaliefox:

magic-in-every-book:

powells:

If you like to play The Last of Us, then try
Rot & Ruin by Jonathan Maberry

If you like to play Beyond: Two Souls, then try The Girl With All the Gifts by M.R. Carey

If you like to play Call of Duty: Black Ops (Zombies), then try
World War Z by Max Brooks

If you like playing Grand Theft Auto, then try
American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis

If you like playing Sid Meier’s Civilization, then try

A Game Of Thrones by George R. R. Martin

If you like playing Final Fantasy, try playing
Fullmetal Alchemist by Hiromu Arakawa

If you like playing Mass Effect, then try
Illuminae by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff

If you like playing Alice: Madness Returns, then try Madness So Discreet by Mindy McGinnis

If you like playing Halo, then try
Starship Troopers by Robert A Heinlein

If you like playing Portal, then try
House Of Stairs by William Sleator

If you like playing Mario Kart, then try

The Lovely Reckless by Kami Garcia 

If you like playing Dark Souls, then try
Anna Dressed in Blood by Kendare Blake

If you like playing Life Is Strange, then try
We Are Okay by Nina Lacour

If you like playing Stardew Valley, then try
How I Live Now by Meg Rosoff

If you like playing Fable, then try
Young Elites by Marie Lu

If you like playing Borderlands, then try
Velocity by Chris Wooding

If you like playing Dishonored, then try
Airman by Eoin Colfer

If you like playing The Oregon Trail, then try
Under a Painted Sky by Stacey Lee

If you like playing the Elder Scrolls series, then try
The Naming by Alison Croggon

If you like playing Red Dead Redemption, then try
Vengeance Road by Erin Bowman

If you like playing Bioshock, then try 
Dark Life by Kat Falls

If you like playing Fallout, then try
Razorland by Ann Aguirre 

If you like playing Assasin’s Creed, then try
The Way of Shadows Night by Brent Weeks

If you like playing Dragonage, then try
Ember in the Ashes by Sabaa Tahir

If you like playing The Legend of Zelda, then try
Graceling by Kristin Cashore

If you like playing Until Dawn, then try
Ten by Gretchen McNeil

If you like playing Sonic, then try
Maximum Ride by James Patterson

If you like playing Overwatch, then try
Bluescreen by Dan Wells

If you like playing Uncharted, then try
Passenger by Alexandra Bracken

If you like playing Pokemon, then try
Fantastic Beasts & Where to Find Them by JK Rowling, and Newt Scamander

If you like playing Mario Party, then try
Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

This is amazing!!

I have to reblog for two reasons:

1)This is actually a good way to get people into reading.

2)That passive aggressive joke in the last one is pure genius. 

smolsamberg:

me: *knows people can find different things interesting/funny/worth watching and it’s totally normal that we have different opinions on the same stuff*

someone: i don’t like brooklyn nine nine

me:

chronic-illness-support:

grimdarkthroes:

equalityformost:

grimdarkthroes:

as ur friendly Neighborhood Nursing Student™ i feel somewhat compelled to remind everyone with the hot weather:

1. every liquid except sea water and alcohol hydrates you. It’s not CHUG WATER OR DIE. in fact, gatorade and the like are designed to hydrate you efficiently.
2. yeah, this includes coffee and tea and soda. the diuretic is not enough to cancel out the liquid. juices and milk have solids in them, sure, but they’re also mostly liquid! it counts. 
3. your body can only absorb so much water at a time, so chugging 64 oz of water at noon and calling it good will do a wonderful job of flushing your kidneys, but not so much of hydrating your tissues. it’s more important that you’re getting consistent fluid throughout the day. 
4. there’s a lot of fancy ways to determine How Much Water (Liquid) I Should Drink but honestly? 8 oz (1 cup) every other hour on cool days and 8 oz every hour on hot days should be fine (assuming you sleep for a normal amount of time per day…. i’m assuming ur awake 16 hours a day.)
5. figure out how many oz each of ur favorite cups is. it’ll help your guesstimation. 
6. if ur urine is darker than light yellow, you’re dehydrated. 
7. if u pinch the skin on the back of ur hand for a couple seconds and it takes more than a second or two go to back to normal then ur dehydrated. 

In regards to #1, don’t take this as an excuse to drink the sugar water that they call sports drinks. They aren’t bad for you per se, but please choose water.

actually this entire post was written in the spirit of ppl using it as an excuse to drink sports drinks and soda etc

ppl have been commenting abt sodium levels in soda and sugar levels in sports drinks and thats all well and good but what i’ve noticed is that people who internalize “well, ONLY WATER hydrates me” but who HATE WATER remain horrifically dehydrated cause they dont drink anything. 

so like. if ur a person who haaaaates tap water, this is absolutely me giving you permission to drink whatever fluid you can stomach. please take this as a direct excuse to drink nothing but gatorade if that’s what it takes to get enough fluid into ur body.

it’s not the healthiest for you, sure, but you’re a smart enough person to know that. please drink fluids anyways. 

if u like water thats gr8. if you can stomach water that’s gr8. if you can’t, that’s okay too, and you need to stay hydrated just as much as anyone else, so please drink. 

reblogging because it’s so common for chronically ill people (especially us with chronic nausea) to have trouble drinking enough water – drinking stuff with sodium is great for those of us with POTS or adrenal insufficiency, and sugar helps with nausea. I always dehydrate quickly if I don’t keep juice, sodas, and popsicles around.

oh, and one more note: if you get nauseated drinking tap water but not bottled drinks, you may be allergic or sensitive to something in tap water. I’m mildly allergic to fluoride, so I drink (and cook with) Crystal Geyser brand water, which is fluoride-free.