elizabethrobertajones:

(x)

“…. a lemon.”

Dean had never seen Cas squint so suspiciously.

Dean looked helplessly over at where the lemon was standing on one of the library tables, cheerfully pulling pages out of an old spell book for fun. “I guess?”

“Why would you even have a spell that summons lemons?” Cas asked.

Sam cleared his throat. He had a black eye from trying to catch the lemon earlier after it had slipped out of the dungeon a by leaping directly into his face (who knew demon traps didn’t hold citrus fruit?) and bowling him over to clear a path to the door. “We think it was a failed attempt at a spell from the days of ships crossing oceans on long journeys… If they could summon fresh fruit straight onto the ship, more cargo space is free.” He squinted at the scroll they’d found and turned it slightly sideways to off-set the slant of the writing. “We thought a demon-summoning spell that only needed a few candles might be a good way to save on all the ingredients.”

“That lemon does not look like it wants to be eaten.” Cas watched it hop down from the table and run to the war room, where it began kicking folders off the table, smiling its happy little smile all the while. 

“You’re telling me,” Dean said, rolling one shoulder and wincing. It was incredible how much it hurt to have a twenty pound piece of fruit cannonball into you from the balcony by the front door. Thankfully it seemed to have been put off by some of the warding and hadn’t tried venturing outside.

“Perhaps there’s a counter spell to send it back?” Cas asked, stepping carefully out of the way as the lemon rushed past squealing and dragging a roll of rapidly unwinding toilet paper. They watched it go, despair on their faces. It had been a long day. The Bunker had never been more of a mess.

“We tried to find one, but this scroll is practically illegible,” Sam said.

Cas took the scroll and his eyes darted over each line at a regular reading pace. “It’s just in cursive. It even says, ‘How to Summon A Lemon”

Sam and Dean exchanged a glance.

Sam cleared his throat again. “Who even learns how to write in cursive any more these days.”

“We had monsters to hunt when we were kids.”

Cas rolled his eyes at them. 

“It says the lemon comes from a fairy realm. I think we should be able to find some banishing spells in some of the books in here.”

“If it doesn’t destroy them all first.”

There were a series of prolonged metallic crashes from down the hall.

“It’s in the kitchen,” Sam said despairingly.

Dean pulled his gun out. “That’s it. We’re ending this and having tequila shots with lemon to celebrate.”

@gyhldeptis

fancy-trashblog:

discountliquor:

wraparoundcurl:

lifesustainingmeasures:

fork-a-nature:

afloweroutofstone:

Dale Earnhardt, Jr. Tweeted in support of the NFL protesters and added that JFK quote, “Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.” Which. Is unfathomably woke for NASCAR

I mean, wrong Dale Earnhardt in the photo but it works for me.

Dale Jr also spoke up to support immigrants and he pushed for the removal of confederate flags from race cars.

Junior also put a piece of tape under the left “headlight” of his car as a tribute to Left Eye’s memory after she died. (Red #8)

I was not expecting any of this??

I have this mental image of the sort of people that are NASCAR drivers, probably driven by the sort of people that are very vocal about liking NASCAR, and this is surprising to me. Tell it like it is, Dale Jr.

ibelieveinthelittletreetopper:

postmodernmulticoloredcloak:

awed-frog:

Wait, so ‘pumpkin spice’ has nothing to do with pumpkin and is simply what you use to make gingerbread? 

Jesus. Why are Americans always so weird?

WAIT WHAT

SOME pumpkin spice stuff has pumpkin flavor in it, and for instance I make pumpkin spice bread. But it’s the seasoning for pumpkin pie.

…..do you have that?

Usually a pumpkin spice latte or shake is going to taste like pumpkin pie, but pumpkin spice itself does not.