ibelieveinthelittletreetopper:

audiaphilios:

lenyberry:

transgirlkyloren:

like a year ago I saw a trailer for Some Fucking Romcom where I thought for the first thirty seconds the plot was “bride asks her gay brother and his boyfriend to get heterosexual dates for her wedding”

turns out the plot actually was “bride asks her two Commitmentphobic ™ brothers to get dates for her wedding” which, lame

I like my idea, where two gay dudes and two lesbians have to pretend to be straight for an entire weekend 

“I can definitely pretend to be straight,” Lesbian One says, “I successfully pretended to be a straight man for twenty years.”

“No,” her girlfriend Lesbian Two says, “no you definitely didn’t.”

Lesbian Two, who is butch, discovers an eyelash curler. “What is this, a torture device?”

Gay Guy One hooks up with the DJ, the wedding planner, three caterers and the best man. Shenanigans happen as he narrowly avoids getting caught by the bride.

Gay Guy Two, of course, finds himself falling hopelessly in love with the groom.

At the climax of the movie Gay Guy One falls out of the closet where he’s making out with his latest conquest, the florist. The bride screams, eyeliner smearing from tears, about how he’s RUINING HER WEDDING and she didn’t choose to have a brother who was QUEER and why didn’t he ever think about HER and why couldn’t he just pretend to be NORMAL for her SPECIAL DAY–

the groom is like “honey, I’m bi”

the bride says “no, you’re not! you’re marrying me! you’re straight now!”

and then the wedding is called off and Gay Guy Two and the groom live happily ever after. the after-credits scene is Lesbian Two suspiciously poking her eyelids with an eyelash curler

Please write this movie.

Play It Straight (2019)

I want it

Georgia Cop Fired After Telling White Woman ‘We Only Shoot Black People’

violent-darts:

The part of this one that really stands out for me in a good way is what the Chief of Police is reported as saying later in the article: 

Register said he’s known Abbott for many years and has known him to be an honorable man. The report from the internal review indicates that Abbott was trying to be sarcastic and to address the situation as he perceived it, Register said.

“He made a mistake,” Register said. “I don’t know what’s in his heart but I certainly know what came out of his mouth. It’s inexcusable.”

This is important. 

It doesn’t matter that the cop had a long history of being an “honorable man”. It doesn’t matter what he was trying to do even if it is in fact the case. And it doesn’t matter what’s ‘in his heart.’

What came out of his mouth is inexcusable and utterly incompatible with being an officer of the law. And it is not being excused, and he is no longer being allowed to be an officer of the law. 

This is actually a very, very important bit of distinction and juxtaposition. There are things you can say, just once, or do, just once, there are mistakes you can make just once that do in fact make you unsuitable thereafter to be an officer of the law (or, harking back to more recent Canadian similar issues, a justice of the peace, or other empowered official in the field of law enforcement). Even if you are otherwise a good person. Even if you didn’t mean it like that. 

Because that’s how important these jobs are. And how important building trust is, and how fraught the situations are, and how DAMAGING this shit can be to that trust. 

Georgia Cop Fired After Telling White Woman ‘We Only Shoot Black People’

probablydogrpgideas:

probablycatrpgideas:

catphistopheles:

tastefullyoffensive:

We don’t deserve dogs.

Story time: 

I was working as a farm hand in Maine in 2012 when Sandy hit, against all odds. New Jersey absolutely had the worst of it, but we were hit with horizontal rain and incredibly intense winds, and none of the houses were really built for it. My boss was out of town and called to tell me I needed to move everything in the barnyard to inside the barn so it didn’t blow away or break or injure anything or anyone. 

They had a dog–a giant, GIANT all-white german shepherd named Dante that came up to my ribs when on all fours. (I’m 5′7″, not exactly short, either.) Dante was basically a dire wolf. He was still a puppy mentally and used to greet me with a happy dance every morning when I arrived at work. Dante, it turns out, was really afraid of storms, probably because they happened so rarely up there.

Point being: Here’s me, 140lbs when wet, trying to drag lumber and yard furniture into a barn without being slammed into the barn or to the ground or broken by the wildly swinging doors. At one point the wind almost carried me off and I was scared shitless. 

And out comes Dante from his nice, warm, safe, cozy dog condo thing. His tail was tucked and his ears were flat but he started walking with me from the lumber to the barn, back and forth. I wasn’t sure what he was doing and was too tired to really think about it until the wind picked up again and I almost toppled over–EXCEPT I DIDN’T, because Dante had braced himself and caught my weight with his side. 

Basically DANTE WAS KEEPING ME SAFE in the storm and he helped me finish up and crawled back into his safe little house when I was done. I snuck him a hefty handful of treats before I left. He was seriously the best dog Ever.

@probablydogrpgideas your campaign is a bunch of good doggos facing their fears for their human friends

this v. good idea

much approve

these doggos are best doggos. good boys.