“Dean,” Cas says, coming into the storage room. “Have you seen the…? Oh.”
Dean sits up with a groan, inching away from the weird, stone-carved statue beside his foot. He’d caught it on instinct when it came tumbling out of one of the boxes, and it’d immediately knocked him on his ass. Some kind of mojo had jolted through him; a bright blue electric shock that still has him twitching a little.
“Are you all right?” Cas asks.
Dean starts to say, “Yeah,” but what comes out is, “My ass hurts. I think I bruised my tailbone.”
Cas picks is way through the other stuff that fell out of the box, mostly papers yellowed with dust and age. “What happened?”
“I knocked over a box, and that fell out of it. I – I, um –”
“Did you touch it?”
“Just for a second.”
Cas frowns at it. “It’s a statue of Ma’at, the Egyptian goddess of truth. I’ve seen similar statues of Veritas and Altheia; in ancient times, they were used to make criminals confess.”
“Oh, God,” Dean says, rubbing his face. He’s got plenty of truth inside him, and none of it is the kind of thing he wants to admit to Cas. “Can you fix it?”
Crouching beside him, Cas lightly touches his forehead. He grits his teeth against the familiar, chilly sweep of grace; once it passes, he still has an itch under his skin.
“Sorry,” Cas says, shaking his head. “This is old magic, and.. tenacious. If you only touched the statue briefly, it should pass in a few minutes.”
“Okay, okay,” Dean says. “Can you, can you –um.”
“I’ll go if you want.”
Dean starts to nod his head, but then his big, dumb mouth opens and he blurts out, “No, I don’t want you to go. I never want you to go. I wish you’d stay here all the time.”
Thankfully, Cas doesn’t try to respond to that. He just clears a space on the floor with his foot and sits down about three feet away. A full thirty seconds ticks by; Dean does his best to ride the restless, rising feeling inside him, but eventually it crests, washing over him like a wave.
“I want you to sit closer.”
Cas studies him for a moment, then shifts over about a foot. “Is that better?”
“No,” Dean says. God, he wants to die. “Closer.”
Cas shifts again, straightening his leg and pressing his thigh against Dean’s. Another thirty seconds rolls by; the words crowd into Dean’s throat, spilling out before he can swallow them.
“I want to hold your hand.”
“Okay,” Cas says, offering his hand palm up. When Dean doesn’t take it – he’s too busy staring at it, horrified – Cas just reaches over and laces their fingers together.
Another thirty seconds; humiliation is a living thing in Dean’s gut, but he can’t fucking stop.
“Cas, I — you, um – ” Dean takes a deep breath and bites the inside of his cheek, but it doesn’t stop the words from bubbling up. “Cas, I –”
Cas leans in and kisses him, soft and slow. He tips his head to the side as he pulls away, asking, “Is that what you wanted?” in voice that makes heat wrap around the base of Dean’s spine.
“Yes,” Dean admits, heat flooding his face. “I’m sorry, you –”
“Dean.”
“You should just –”
Cas kisses him again, tugging on his hand until he’s half in Cas’ lap. His coat smells like the inside of the Continental, and his other hand curls into Dean’s hair. He makes a gorgeous noise, so throaty and deep Dean wants to nudge him down onto the floor, slide over him, kiss him everywhere, but that thought startles him back to reality.
“Cas,” he says miserably. “You don’t have to. I’m just –” he waves his hand “ – it’s okay.”
Cas frowns at him for a second, then leans over and brushes his fingers over the statue’s feet. Everything flashes blue.
“Cas –”
“I only leave because I must,” Cas says, his voice far steadier than Dean’s has been. “If I had my way, I would stay here with you. I wanted to kiss you. I’ve loved you for years.”
Dean chokes out a noise. “Fuck.”
“When we were first given the mission to retrieve you from hell, I feared at what we would find, but your soul was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.” He touches Dean’s chest, then slides his hand to the hollow of Dean’s throat. “It was so bright.”
The mojo floods out of Dean in a rush, but he looks at Cas and says, “I love you too,” and means every word.
I’m sorry you feel that way. And I get it, I relate to this, because I have felt this way for a long time, actually. :p There is awesome meta out there that gives you high expectations that the SPN writers fail to meet every single time. There are the critics who dislike Destiel and say that you are delusional for at all seeing what you see. And so on, and so forth.
But here is what you’ve got to remember whenever you are in doubt: just stick to the facts.
—
FACT #1:
“I killed two angels this week, some of my brothers. I’m hunted, I’ve rebelled, and I did it, all of it, for you.”
An angel who has existed for millions of years, within the space of a year threw away everything he knew, even his own family, because of one simple human being. Not for Heaven, or humanity, or the greater good. For Dean. He forgets about everything he’s ever believed in, all for a guy he met a year ago? It’s the classical angel falls for a human love story, no matter how you try to twist it.
–
FACT #2:
Dean pining over his so-called platonic dude-bro on SPN:
Sam pining over his lost love on the actual same show:
–
FACT #3
Show runner Jeremy Carver himself slipped Misha Collins a note to play Cas as a jilted lover in episode 9×06. If the show runner sees their relationship like that, how are YOU supposed to see it?
–
FACT #4
Ironically something that I have just reblogged:
Now parallels between shows (even when those shows are on the same network) are always debatable. They are often interesting, but don’t necessarily have to mean anything. But this is the same show. These are the same writers. Using the exact same dialogue for a couple that is clearly not platonic, and one that they keep claiming is platonic. You make of that what you want.
–
FACT #5
There are many different ways to put this, but if we call a spade a spade, Cas has literally been shown pining for Dean
And Dean has literally been shown pining for Cas
“You look sad when you think he can’t see you”. These two gave that sentence a whole new meaning on so many occasions, not just the two examples that I just gave.
–
FACT #6
The everybody knows trope.When one person jokes about it, it’s just teasing. When two persons do it, it’s a coincidence. But when everyone does it…
Enough said. Three times is a pattern. Even more times is… well, yeah.
–
FACT #7
Most looks between them are open to interpretation, no matter what we want to see. They seriously are. However, some of them are so blatant, that not much room is left to give your own spin to it…
Pining, longing, lusting. I tried to come up with better labels, but found none.
–
FACT #8
Every interpretation is valid, no matter what anyone says. In fact, fan interpretations are the reason any show will even LIVE to see a season 10.
–
FACT #9
None of this necessarily proves that Destiel is canon, but it IS proof that this ship is as valid (if not even more) as basically all canon straight ships on TV right now. Don’t ever feel weird or insecure for seeing what you see. This is either the most epic slow-burn love story ever told, or the biggest queer bait in the history of ever. Which one of the two it is, time will tell, but meanwhile, don’t let other people make you feel bad about this because it is not a male/female ship.
Also, I am sorry for taking 5 days to answer you, because I had a crazy busy week, but stuff like this just makes me sad, and I hope this helps you, or any other Destiel shippers who have doubts.
Cas looked uncomfortable with the idea of them staying longer than was strictly necessary. “Alright,” he conceded. “But as soon as this is over they have to go back. Who knows what staying here could do to them?”
Decided to re-draw one of my old pictures and chose this one. I wanted to see if I could capture a bit more movement/life than I did the first time around.
Tumblr backup 